Diary of a Failed Game Designer

Seraph’s Boxes of Mysteries. The good wizard Seraph wanted to create a box. A box containing a perfectly warm, safe place for his pets to travel with him when he was on the road. He tried many times, but each time another failure. These items represent his best attempts. Four identical boxes one he kept, and one gifted to his son in law as part of the dowry, and two gifted to local lords / patrons as thanks for their tireless support. Physical Description: Each box is exactly two cubic feet, made of a fine hardwood stained deepest black. All of the panels edges are reinforced with thin strips of iron.Each box has a well crafted lock (DC 20 to pick) and latch on it’s lid. This latch allows the whole top panel to be removed. The interior of the box is lined with purple velvet, the interior surface opposite the lid is a endlessly ebbing and flowing pool of darkness. In play: Any item that can fit into the boxes opening can be placed in the box. The box can hold up to 20 items. There are ...

World wrecking  Magic ahead, (Or at least the kind of magic that complicates the shit right out of everything. [ It was first reported to be owned owned by the Sultan Orhaun, in the land of Min. It was lost at sea, durring the battle of 1000 fallen stars. It reappeared on the  breast of a queen. It has been stolen time and time again. When the opportunity  cam about the elder mage Gramastus  was afraid to study it. It is called the Blood of the Desert, though it has been called many things in the past. It's  by all accounts a large uncut Ruby. The stone will not take a facet, no jeweler has been able to shape or mar it's surface. In fact Ohzmet Qutar the  greatest jeweler of his time was put to death when he failed to facet the stone for his king. Those who possess the stone gain a hidden power. If the  stone is worn while sleeping , the wearer will consistently dream of a tiny  green speck. Over time if the  wearer becomes aware of this drea...

Magic item time. System agnostic. This was inspired by the call for  magic items to be used in the   Lamentations of the  Flame Princess. I'm not entering a magic item because I have no idea at all about the aesthetic of LotFP.  I don't own the game, I have not read it. I have only seen the incredible art in bits and pieces around the web. while I kind of get the idea, I don't think I get it well enough to waste anyone's time. Point being I don't think about magic items all that much, but it got me thinking. Gloves of Memories Lost: Rarity: Unique.   http://www.strangelove.net/~kieser/Medieval/Knitting/knittingnotes.html Appearance: Red cloth, medium length, worn finish, embroidered with a gold string around the cuff. Old. Dusty. Blood stained. These gloves were commissioned by an underworld figure that had become obsessed with knowing others secrets. They served him for several years, then at the time of his death were lost. The  enchanter who made the ...

The Pins of Skull Crushing: Description: This item is a two inch long golden hat pin, the head of the pin is a tiny but detailed ivory skull wearing a thorny crown and processing eyes set with small ruby flakes. If held up to candle light the shaft of the pins will reflect not only golden light but a dark crimson hue as well. Story: While it is no longer known who created the Pins what is known is that they are assassin’s relics, created for the sole purpose of eliminating a single target in the most shocking way possible. It is said that originally a set of six pins were created however over time most of the pins were lost or expended. The pin must be forcefully placed into the back of a targets head, i.e. jabbed in during an attack. The pin on its own does no damage however (see mechanics below) if the pin is well placed the targets head will violently implode on the next turn, killing the victim and sending a shower of gore in all direction. The shaft of the pin is consumed the tiny...

Gm’s and magic items. I think GM’s who were brought up on AD&D and its ilk get a bit too caught up in what magic items “do” rather than what they “are.” That ring of protection + 1 that was just found in some dank corner of a dungeon can be easily swept aside in a game by simply focusing on mechanics. This ring when worn gives the wearer a bonus of 1 to their armor class.  Fancy that, and useful to boot. However even the most run of the mill magic items still represent a creation of some effort by some craftsman with both the  jewelers skill to produce the ring and an enchanters skill in  granting a constant magical effect. Simple wood ring, or the Hirophant Druids ring of spell Turning? Not exactly something that would be given out lightly or treated roughly. For a common person a simple ring of AC plus one is an heirloom. How would that common person  with less experience dealing with magical  effects view that golden ring that uncle Garaius passed down? I...

      I was flipping  though and old game notebook from an old AD&D game I had found up in my attic the other night and I came a crossed the description of a cursed sword and a paragraph of where it had come form and where it had gone. That was my habit at the time, if I made an item I wrote a quick blurb about who made it where it came from and how it  ended up where ever it was when the players might find it, I'm glad I had all that creative  energy back then because I don't think I have it in me to be so thorough anymore. I thought this sword was particularly nasty sounding, so I wrote it up a bit more completely. Perhaps some one could find a use for it in their games. I was thinking, Having a string of murders that can be traced to some poor soul holding this sword could make a for an interesting Jack the Ripper style murder mystery plot. The Story of Mailik and Hyrum:      Seven skeletons of seven priests each with a silver dagger s...