Diary of a Failed Game Designer

The Mosstaro: Physical: Size Small: Less than 4.5 feet tall, usually very broad shouldered. The do not have necks and can not turn their heads. Coloration: molted greens and browns. Skin is leathery with leaf like flaps which vary in color from dark black to bright green. Eyes range from dark black to deep red with have two retinas each. Thick arms end in broad hands each with two thick digits. Trunk like legs end in flat three toed feat. Speed: 30 feet per round walking, They may sprint at 50 feet per round but only in bursts of a single round with a "rest round" in between. They may climb vegetation at 30 feet per round vertically or horizontally. They are simply not slowed or effected by difficult woodland terrain. The move very natural through forests. Hit points / Health: Depending on your system of choice. Use the hit point statistics given for  Dwarves, or their nearest analog. Difficulty to hit: Again depends highly on your system, again use armor statistics for dwa...

Giant insects are a D&D  stand by. It's hard to find a dungeon that doesn't at least have a few giant beetles spewing toxic fluids around. Admittedly they are one of my own favorite go to monsters. One thing I think has been slightly overlooked of the the years are the myriad of  real hunting and defensive mechanisms insects employ. If by  making any old insect "giant" it becomes that much more dangerous why not  extrapolate some of their more exotic abilities into the realm of fantasy as well. Now I'm not crazy enough to think I can write about even a small percentage of insects  in this format. Instead I'm going to try and  hit on some of my favorites. Wasps and Hornets: I love wasps. Few things interest me more than all the different ways they have found to survive. Aerial hunters extraordinaire it seems that these gals have evolved hundreds of ways to attack and  kill prey. One thing to think about is wasps are in many cases ambush predators, w...

I have a senario I have run a few times since I was in high school, usually for new players. It's  ostensibly called the  Dirt Monster adventure. Some of my players might remember running it though to be honest it has been a long time. The game is set up for low level Players. A very simple, cliche set up. Players are in a town , hear a rumour of a local who is having trouble with what little live stock he  keeps. Livestock mostly pigs are showing up dead but uneaten, stocks of  bagged up  walnuts ransacked. So here is the  backstory.  These things can be found out by talking to the farmer. The  farmer a year ago expanded his far to include new grazing lands. In doing so he cleared out some of his old and overgrown  walnut trees. The trees have always been there but are not as productive or as profitable as pigs, so down they came. What nutts he could harvest were bagged and put in the barns basement (which has a floor made of large flagstone...

"Mr. Lavant is covered in custard. Or perhaps it's some form of slime mold. Custard as rule doesn't move on its' own. Light your torches boys. Don't worry about Lavant it's too late for him. He would have wanted it this way, poor, brave, old chap." Slime molds are about the most interesting and naturally creepy things in nature. As such they have earned a bit of place in Old D&D and fantasy games in general. Large magically mobile and aggressive molds, puddings and slimes are splattered all over the monster manuals. I want to step back from the fantasy for a second and look at these nasty buggers as they are in nature. Then let's take that information and use it build some slimes for our games. Source First off Slimes in many fantasy games are considered dungeon or cave monsters, and that makes sense. Damp and devoid of light a typical dungeon setting would be a great place for a huge slime to thrive. As long as there's food around. A construct...

"The creature of smoke and shadow unseated sir percival from his steed, and  in that moment Percival knew he was weak, knew he was not worthy of his title, and he wept."                                                                                                                         *Wrote nobody   Background: In my  D&D campaign there is a Druid. Capital D because he is the only, the last druid. One of the threads the group is currently tugging on  involves the Druid seeking out magical energy and using it to re establish the  system of ley lines that was destroyed many years ago. (Many years in game and in  real life.)   One of his tool is a seed...

Sort of  a big deal: Over this long weekend I created what I called Amazing Adventures and Exciting Exploits “Final” PDF. Which is the first time I have used the term Final concerning this project. As any of you  who work on  "Do it your self"  game design already know "Final" is a tricky concept. I spent the  weekend tightening up the index and  adding  bits and pieces here and there, finding things to clarify and tweak. It's about 95 pages as is, It will likely bloat to 100 when I add in a few more play examples and that sort of thing  I have to be honest from the art, to the writing,  to the lay out, it's all incredibly unprofessional I have no allusions otherwise, but  it is playable and fun so at least I have that on my side. So we come to this, next after another week or so of tweaking and  reading and letting  my friends pour over the damn thing I plan on offering up the PDF to any takers. My question to you fine folks i...

Another A.A.E.E. (Amazing Adventurers & Exciting Exploits) Monster Ecology. After the first Ecology post there was a deafening out cry and demand for another! (Meaning one of my friends mentioned it in passing.) I give you: The Ecology of the Slug-Goblin. Intro: Deep in the woods, where only wild creatures, druids and the occasional lost elf dare tread, the slug goblins make their camps. It is not known where they came from but they live only to take from others. They are the creeping thugs of the dark woods trails; the brigands that rob form the weak and just keep it.  The slug goblin is the lowest common denominator, preying on the common folk who don’t have the skills to defend themselves, bullies. They pose the type of menace that fresh adventures will often choose to deal with. Society: Slug goblins organize themselves in groups called “camps.” The camps will generally have a leader and up to 20 slug goblins working with him. These camps can be best described as rowdy coll...

A creature for use wherever you need to add something different (silly): This creature first appeared during one of our games of Phase Abandon, when the narrating player (me) confused his Harpies and his Sirens. It has since taken on a life of it's own. So here they are stated out for Amazing Adventurers and exciting Exploits, the Sharpies of Lundonium. Ecology of the Sharpie, Introduction: The Sharpie also known as “Street Siren” or “Alley Hag” is a mythological amalgam of a shore born Siren, a vicious harpy and a musician’s tainted soul. They live in groups (a group of Sharpies is a called a pak) with as few as two and sometimes as many as a dozen. They are attracted to the darkest alleys and loneliest corners of urban areas by the sounds practicing musicians.  While a musicians mortal is what soul that attracts them Sharpies still have to eat and will kill beggars, prostitutes, and drunks for food. This habit of feeding on the forgotten and neglected strata of a cities populatio...