Where is that Darn NPC? (1d12 table.)

I,m not even giving an attempt at context.

Where is that damn NPC?
(1d12)
  1. Attending a viewing of an “orctopsy “or the autopsy of a dead orc at the local university.  Did you know Orc livers are bivalve in design and almost twice as big as a liver of a normal human? Did you know Orcs have a second smaller sub stomach used to store and slowly digest fibrous matter? Learn these things and so much more at the Ocrtopsy.
  2. The NPC is at the inn and has been drinking heavily. You find him or her gleefully chatting up a well-known local prostitute and about to make some bad life decisions.
  3. The NPC is out wandering the fields looking to catch a weasel. The NPC wants the weasel to train for rabbiting. Unfortunately, the NPC has no idea how to properly trap anything.
  4. The NPC is skulking around the dark corners of the local streets, trying to trail a lover who has recently spurned him or her.
  5. The NPC is at the town hall trying to get recognition for a lease that will grant him or her ownership of a land parcel. The lease was won gambling and is being contested by the current land holder.
  6. The NPC is sitting quietly at home mending some clothing. There is a pie in the oven, a cat asleep at the door…idyllic.
  7. The NPC is sitting at the edge of town, bull shitting with a gnome. The gnome runs off as you approach, the NPC plays it off like nothing happened.
  8. You find the NPC in the early morning traveling back into town via a game train in the nearby wood. The NPC is carrying a large sack. If asked about the sack he or she will be elusive

    The sack contains: 1d6
    1. Several pounds of snails.
    2. D4 severed heads
    3. Stolen gold candle sticks
    4. Three very large eggs
    5. A quietly sleeping baby cockatrice.
    6. Several pounds of strange wild mushrooms.
  9. The NPC is in the inn singing a raucous song, with no intention of leaving the party anytime soon.
  10. You find the NPC digging a large hole in the middle of a field.
  11. The NPC is in a church quietly reflecting. If you disturb the NPC, he or she begins to weep.
  12. You find the NPC on a corner, chastising his or her children for their bad behavior.
I hope all of you fine folks at GenCon 2016 have a great time! Happy gaming to all.
Thanks for reading.
-Mark.


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